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The Rick Report: Pre-Season Game #6
Chicago Bulls 94 Toronto Raptors 91
October 22nd, 2003

That loud bang that residents of Toronto heard last night was the Chris Bosh bandwagon careening into a concrete abutment beneath the Gardiner Expressway. After a number of decent pre-season performances Raptor message boards everywhere were aglow with fantasies of Bosh starting at power forward or Bosh winning the Rookie of the Year or Bosh solving the Israel/Palestine conflict.

After the 4-points-on-11%-shooting-with-3-turnovers-while-becoming-Marcus-Fizer's-bitch kind of night Bosh just had everyone can now put their dicks back in their pants and take a more realistic look at the youngster. He's got skills. He's got a good head for the game. He takes instruction very well. He's got potential. He'll get there, just not immediately. Have patience everyone!

Folk hero Rick Brunson played 15 minutes, the most minutes he's played all pre-season. There were no reports indicating just how winded
Brunson must have been afterwards. Rick responded to the extra playing time by continuing to do absolutely nothing. But the things Brunson
does best do not always end up on the scoresheet! Unfortunately the scoresheet does record points and the Bulls scored more than the Raptors on this night. The scoresheet also records turnovers - 27 for the Raptors, 22 for the Bulls. So at least our team won that battle. Rick did his part by turning it over 2 times while not making any steals.

Eyewitnesses indicate that Rick played most of his minutes in the 2nd quarter. Coincidentally the 2nd quarter was the Raptors worst offensive quarter of the game. Although Rick seemed to pass the ball to Vince Carter every trip down the court he did not tally a single assist. He did score with a Chris Jefferies-like efficiency (i.e. 1 for 1) on a give and go with Vince. The Raptors might have won had Coach O'Neill given Brunson Jefferies-like minutes.

  • Starting power forward Jerome Moiso recorded the same number of rebounds as a corpse.
  • Has anybody else noticed that Lamond Murray's FG percentage drops every game?
  • They say that men get more handsome as they age... except for Scottie Pippen.

Does this look official?  It ain't. (C) 2003 Rick Brunson Fan Club -