From: "Joanne Balfour" <jbalfour@cogeco.ca>

First off, Rick is actually in the NBA so stop insulting him. If you tried to play in the NBA, you would get stuffed, stolen, and dunked on all game-long. You talk so much trash about him and he would absolutley kill you 1on1 so just keep that in mind.

David

Dear Whiny Little Baby Davey,

Here is a fun and challenging series of questions. Please read them out loud. Gather what friends you still have so they can help you if you get stuck:

• Should Whiny Little Baby Davey waste people's time by actually taking Rick Brunson .com seriously? N-O.
• Does Rick Brunson .com even care what Whiny Little Baby Davey thinks? N-O.
• Do you think Rick actually cares what a bunch of internet hacks think? N-O.
• Does Rick need to be defended by Whiny Little Baby Davey? N-O.
• Does Rick deserve our pity for making big money on the bench? N-O.
• Does Old Man Bueale get to sit and watch basketball for money? N-O.
• Could OMB potentially win a 1-on-1 game of intense bench sitting vs. Rick? Y-E-S.
• Is slapping away pathetic emails OMB's "A" game? Y-E-S.
• Was Whiny Little Baby Davey's email particularly pathetic? Y-E-S.
• Did Whiny Little Baby Davey just get stuffed, stolen and dunked on all game long? Y-E-S.
• Should Whiny Little Baby Davey stop using his Mom's email account? Y-E-S.

Sincerely,
Old Man Bueale
Rick Brunson .com

From: "John Venables" <porkey221@hotmail.com>

lmao your a huge ego maniac! get over yourself you fool!

Dear John,

I am so glad that there are people in the world like you, people who express themselves in emails like they're in a chat room, people who apparently don't have a SHIFT key on their keyboards, people who are desperate to get themselves on a fan mail page in the back alleys of the Internet.

It's people like you who justify an ego like mine without even having to type a response! So thank you, and welcome to the Rick Brunson fan club! Without people like you, I would simply cease to exist. Humble enough for you? Good. Now back to my ego. If it wasn't for you, I might have to justify my gigantic ego in the following way:

1. Rick Brunson .com has been mentioned in 3 newspapers:

http://slam.canoe.ca/Slam/Basketball/NBA/Toronto/2003/10/02/215361.html
http://www.thestar.com/
http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com

2. Rick Brunson .com has been interviewed on the radio:

http://home.cogeco.ca/~justhoops/Index.htm

3. Rick Brunson .com was discussed at length during a television broadcast on October 10th of the Raptors vs. Panathinaikos game.

4. Rick Brunson .com is currently listed on the Toronto and Chicago team pages on ESPN:

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/clubhouse?team=chi
http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/clubhouse?team=tor

5. Rick Brunson .com is now #9 with a bullet when you do a search for "Rick Brunson" on Google.

Not that we've gone out searching for this kind of attention. All we were trying to do originally was get a few laughs, and then it just grew from those humble beginnings. Shit, let's get back to my ego again!

So what have you done with your life, sonny? Apparently you've sent me a sorry-looking email telling me that my ego makes you laugh your ass off. Sorry, that should be 'makes you lyao', right? So, you're laughing, and that's a good thing, right? So what exactly is your problem then?

Other than the fact that you're an idiot, that is.

Affectionately yours,
Old Man Bueale
Rick Brunson .com

From: IILLNYIIL@aol.com

You guys sucks and your site is horrible. How dare you do this to a future NBA Legend? I have met Rick Brunson several times and it's an honor to breathe the same air as him. He has a family and a young son think about how your affecting him. I will laugh at you as he leads the Raptors to the promise land. Time after Time Rick has proven he is on the verge of being an all-star. All you guys owe him a big apology.

-Kwame Smith

Dear Rick Brunson,

On behalf of the five of us who suck because we run this horrible site, I would like to officially extend our most sincere and abject apologies to you, Rick Brunson...

...for having had the terrible misfortune of meeting some pathetic fan-boy named Kwame Smith on numerous occasions, and been forced to breath the same air as him.

We now truly understand what you must be going through having to deal with such a deranged individual, obviously a pathetically misguided stalker who seems very suspiciously interested in your family and son. For some reason, we at Rick Brunson .com suspect that he might be only one of many strange, anonymous internet hacks haunting your every footstep.

Of course, that is part of the price for the tremendous fame that you have achieved, and surely it must be balanced out by all the groupies that a man of your stature must attract, right? I ask you this in all seriousness, because every email I answer here probably makes me another enemy. I want to make sure that the honeys are on their way shortly. There's that whole karma thing goin' on, right?

Awaiting your reply,
Old Man Bueale
Rick Brunson .com

FROM: "Aimee Longombe" <gombe23@hotmail.com>
SUBJECT: Yes! I too love Rick Brunson!

Why don't you stop sweating Mr. Brunson and give the man some credit. At least he is STILL in the league, unlike some 1 year contract wanna-be NBA players....Give credit where credit is do and stop HATING!!!!

FROM: "Myers, Amy" <AMyers@shalomcharlotte.org>
SUBJECT: Yes! I too love Rick Brunson!

who the hell are you and what is your deal?

Dear Anyone Named Amy, Amie, Aimee, Aymee, or Aimey,

We have now received several emails from people named Amy, each one similarly cattee. So apparently all of you have formed a little club and are unified in your dislike of Rick Brunson .com and your inability to correctly spell your name. That's okay with us, since we are now unified in our dislike of you.

Since I find it very disappointing that people named Amy seem to be so universally bitchie, I see it as no big loss if I just write ALL of you off. The one Amy that I ever really knew was completely ditzie, so I've had an early education in what you people are like. I might feel a pang of regret were I to ever meet an Amy who was blonde and bustee, but it seems a small price to pay to rid my life of all of you once and for all.

Here are my last words to you, Amy: stop being so whinee or I might actually have to get nastie.

"Sincerelee",
Old Man Bueale
Rick Brunson .com

From: "Amy Grimshaw" <almm24@hotmail.com>
Date: Sun, 28 Sep 2003 10:09:33 -0400

Subject:

Who are you? And why would you try and down a man who has worked his butt off to work in the League. Sure he is Jordan, or Kobe, but he is there year after year earning a living just like you and I. Is it jealousy? maybe, but whatever it is you should be ashamed of yourself, and stop putting so much energy in making fun of someone else, and work on yourself.

You are a TRUE LOSER>>

Dear Amy,

Thanks for your email! Allow me to answer all your questions on behalf of my cult. Who are we? We are in fact a secretive and sinister organization plotting world domination. We have chapters in Toronto, Syracuse, Chicago, Portland, Boston, Orlando and Zurich. Please don't tell any one, or you'll ruin all our plans.

I'm sure you can imagine how a subversive plot such as ours takes immense time and careful planning, so in the meantime we've decided to hone our skills by poking fun at Rick Brunson. You might say that every war has a first engagement; or that every alien invasion has a first contact; or that every plan to take over the world has a whipping boy.

You are right, we ARE jealous. We've put countless days of effort into our plans for conquest, while people like Rick Brunson just sit around, riding the pine and becoming the toast of the town. Rick Brunson represents everything that we are not: over six feet tall, making sweet money, nice fro, good teeth, unsurpassed lay-up drill technique, has a web site about him, and loves his Mom.

I ask you: who wouldn't be jealous?

Perhaps I've helped you to see that even you might be a little bit jealous of Rick Brunson, and now you will take back your hateful words towards us, because they wounded us deeply, and made us doubt for a moment the purity of our quest. But our resolve is firm, and our wellspring of strength and Rick Brunson humour runs deep.

If you wish to join us and make the world a better place for us to live in, all you have to do is send us an email and make just one little, itty-bitty, teensy-weensy butt-patt joke about Rick, and YOU ARE IN!

Perhaps we'll even let you open a Charlotte chapter someday...

Sincerely,
Old Man Bueale
Rick Brunson .com